Winter Olympics = Russian Heat

Suddenly, Fifi’s partner’s hand slipped…

From February 7 to 23 Rhyll Biest will have her eyes glued to the televised (buttocks of hot male athletes) Olympic Winter Games being held in Sochi, Russia.

Because Russia and Russians do special things for her lady-parts, she’s spent a little too much time thinking about all the fun things that could happen between randy Winter Olympics athletes and the locals, and is going to share some scenarios...

1.     Georg the German luge superstar hurtles off his sled and slides two hundred meters down the track. He survives, but his lycra onesie is torn from his body and local spectator Ludmilla Sputnik must throw herself over him to preserve his modesty and Russian national pride. Romance ensues.

2.     Under new Olympic rules, during each shooting round a biathlete must hit five targets and each missed target must be "atoned for" in one of three ways:

·      Cleaning a local lady’s bathroom.

·      Providing a vigorous foot massage to a single lass.

·      Deflowering any spinsters over the age of 20.

Emil from Sweden misses two shots and, after deflowering Olga Snortoff and, to both her great surprise and satisfaction, cleaning her bathroom, romance ensues.

3.     While watching the curling heat between Canada and Finland, 72 year old Maisy is struck by the similarity to lawn bowls and bares her breasts to the players in encouragement. When she requires hospital treatment for frostbite, she meets a lovely Sochi doctor called Yuri. Romance ensues.

4.     No man has ever been able to resist the sultry blonde Sveta, and when she licks the plexiglass, Canadian goalie, Peter, is no exception. After a puck flies into the net between his inattentive legs causing his team to lose, Sveta and her trick pelvis console him for the next seven hours. Romance ensues.

5.     During a practice pair camel spin with her ice skating partner, Fifi locks eyes with a tall, dark handsome security guard sitting by the ice rink. When her partner’s hand slips to touch her somewhere inappropriate during the following one arm overhand lift, the stranger smiles in gentle sympathy, stealing Fifi’s heart. Romance ensues.


If these scenarios warmed you up, head over to Jupiter Gardens and use the code “febheat” through 02/15 for 10% off the title Russian Heat.

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